up in flames.
a night to end all nights. this week that is. words are lost on me at the moment..yet i have so much to write about. i feel happy...confused, but happy. talking to jeremy about the "guy i like" has got me crazily checking my phone wondering "will he call???" i'm turning into one of those stupid girls that i can't stand. someone shoot me.
i seriously wish i could put my thoughts into some kind of words that one may be able to understand. life seems to keep going..while i am just staying put and watching. i wish i didn't know such superficial people..and i wish i didn't care so much. i wish i could be one of those people who is always sure of themselves, sure of what they want and who they want to be. but i'm not. ryan once said to me "if you can't accept yourself, then how can i accept you?" and my answer to that was "yeah, i understand." yet, at the same time i'm thinking...i'm one of those people who doesn't accept things about myself. i do what i want, say what i want, hang out with who i want....but my unhappiness fills almost every aspect of my life. i haven't come to terms with a lot of things in life. a lot of people don't accept me..and thats fine. those people i don't care for much. but there are certain people in my life who i want to accept me...and those are the ones who usually can't.
i'm sitting here listening to incubus. they are such a great band. always knowing how to put things in perspective..at least for me.
