if you don't get it, then just go away

i know, i've already written my entry for today. i only have four minutes left though, so don't make fun of me.

i'm sitting here listening to the radio and just schmoozing around on the computer (great word, i know) and this song came on. i have lots of songs that provoke emotion deep within me, but this one is paticularly close.

and it got me thinking...

so many good things have been happening in my life lately. i have finally become a person i'm happy with, even with all the 'growing up' i have left to do. i've done so much these past few months, i've learned so much about myself and others, and i've said things i never thought i'd say. in a way, these are very good things.

still though, i ache for those people that i've left behind. or rather, that have left me behind.

i long to make things right again, to build up new relationships with them, and to show them how much i have changed.

i just want to start over.

can it be done though? can i truly get past what used to hurt so much, and "build new bridges"?

it's hard to think about, because i hate going back to things that once caused me pain. i think you all understand! i mean, who would want to jump off a huge bridge again after getting a painful wedgie the last time?

not me.

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and for all who are wondering:

yes, diaryland rules my life. the very core of my being depends on writing everyday.

sad, i know.