King Daddy

Seth and I went to meet a couple of friends and listen to a band that Seth knows personally. Big Daddy Weave.

Check them out. Seriously. If you like Christian music, then look 'em up.

Anyway.

It was an interesting day for me. Seeing so many Christians in one place openly praising God is a new thing for me. When Matt, Rick, Seth and I went to 722 in Atlanta-same thing happened. I was blown away. So many Christians in one place, praising God and just enjoying hanging out with one another.

I struggle. Every single day, I struggle with God. Being a new Christian hasn't been easy for me, and I have so many questions for God and struggle with finding the truth every single day. It doesn't mean that I don't love Him, and doesn't mean that I would hesitate to tell anyone how He has changed me....it just means that I struggle.

I don't know all the songs that everyone else seems to have grown up hearing, I don't know all the Bible stories that I should, and there are times when I'm listening to a sermon and wondering who the 'frick' the Pastor is talking about.

It hurts. And it discourages me. I feel like I should know the God that I love so much, and I don't think I do. I just know what I feel, and the stuff that I have studied.

So honestly, today was a blessing of sorts. It helped to be part of something so big and wonderful with people who share the same love that I do. However, it also hurt me. It showed that maybe I'm not as passionate about it because I don't know as much as I should...and that killed me.

I know that loving God isn't about knowing all the songs and Bible stories....but it still hurts.

All right, off to Chinese food and laundry.

Happy Sabbath, kids.