And the cost was so much more...
I've been reading some of my entries from two years ago, and I don't even know the girl that wrote them.
Entries like these make me smile for the mere fact that I am able to feel like that. I don't regret a single minute, and I sure can't say that about every relationship I've ever had.
And entries like this bring tears to my eyes because I remember what it was to feel like that...and be without it now.
No, I'm not sinking back into my Rick phase. I don't know him anymore, and I certainly don't know the Me that he used to love. I'm just lonely. I miss having that person who knows me inside and out, backwards and forwards, sideways and upside down.
It's been two years. Two years. And there hasn't been a single guy (or person for that matter) get me the way that he did.
I'm just lonely. Lonely for that "unconditional, you rock my world, you're the most amazing/smart/beautiful/funny girl that I've ever known" kind of relationship.
Forgive me. I just had to say it.