The ever changing musings of a girl.

If you are reading this via my link from myspace...welcome. You have entered a zone that you rarely visit unless I link you here. A zone that has numerous days of journaling that you probably don't know about. Yes, I do write on here without linking you.

Crazy, crazy me.

And if you are reading this because you are a diaryland buddy or random person who has stumbled across my journal in the vast internet world of random things, hello as well.

I know that I should be in bed. And I know that I should at least be covered up as I sit here and write this, because it is DARN cold. There is actually a blanket on the floor behind me....I really should pick it up. I won't though; this won't take long.

Life just keeps happening. It plunges ahead without waiting for me to be ready, and it rarely stops to look back and make sure that I am still following (correction: stumbling. At best). Life is like my impatient parent; it means well, and has every intention of helping me to grow right....but why does It have to go so fast? Why does It expect me to have it all together when It wants me to?

Not that I am actually complaining. I appreciate Life for all It has done for me, I just wish It would slow down a bit.

I feel like I am constantly being propelled in a direction. Of which direction, I am unsure. I just know that I am going there, and quickly. And as things start to happen, my guard continues to go up. It has to be "all or nothing" with everything, and that is dangerous. I don't trust the emotions of others; I question, I probe, I irritate. I find myself wanting more, but not exactly knowing what that means.

Sometimes, I want to throw myself head first into everything.

But I don't.

I don't trust when I should.